The "Never Say Never" Rule

Whenever a character says that he/she will absolutely, never do something, he/she will be doing that exact thing in the very next scene.

The "Pinkie Taste Test" Rule

Whenever a character, almost always a cop, comes a across a bag filled with a mysterious powder, he or she uses a pinkie finger to probe the bag and then taste whatever the finger picks up. The character then can immediately deduce what narcotic is in the bag.

The "That's a Neat Shot" Rule

This rule applies to any shot in a film framed in such a way to elicit a viewer to think or say: "wow, that's an interesting/neat show." Most of the time, these "neat" shots are put into a film to demonstrate the DP or director's "unique vision" or "artistic mind."

"That Guy" Hall of Fame Presents: Philip Baker Hall

You see him everywhere playing judges and politicians, however Philip Baker Hall might be best remembered for playing the hardboiled library cop Lt. Bookman in Seinfeld's 3rd season episode: "The Library."

BOOKMAN: Yeah, '71. That was my first year on the job. Bad year for libraries. Bad year for America. Hippies burning library cards, Abby Hoffman telling everybody to steal books. I don't judge a man by the length of his hair or the kind of music he listens to. Rock was never my bag. But you put on a pair of shoes when you walk into the New York Public Library, fella.

Hall has 136 acting credits to his name, but his greatest visibility came in the late 90s. In 1997, Hall appeared in both Air Force One as the U.S. Attorney General and in P.T. Anderson's Boogie Nights as porn producer Floyd Gondoli. Hall has also shown up in The Insider, Magnolia (playing a sleazy game show host), The Sum of All Fears, and has made numerous TV guest spots. His worn, wrinkled face conveys a certain authority,which is probably why he plays so many authority figures. With several movies in development and some already on the way, Hall does not seem to be in want of acting roles. Nevertheless, Lt. Bookman will always be how I remember him.

BOOKMAN: Let me tell you something, funny boy... You know that little stamp? The one that says New York Public Library? Well, that may not mean anything to you, but that means a lot to me. One whole helluva lot. Sure, go ahead, laugh if you want to. I've seen your type before -- flashy, making the scene, flaunting convention. Yeah, I know what you're thinking... Why's this guy making such a big stink about old library books? Let me give you a hint, junior. Maybe we can live without libraries, people like you and me.... Maybe. Sure, we're too old to change the world. What about that kid, sitting down, opening a book right now in a branch of the local library and finding pictures of pee-pees and wee-wees in The Cat in the Hat and The Five Chinese Brothers. Doesn't he deserve better? Look, if you think this is about overdue fines and missing books, you'd better think again. This is about that kid's right to read a book without getting his mind warped. Or maybe that turns you on, Seinfeld... Maybe that's how you get your kicks... You and your goodtime buddies... I've got a flash for you, joy boy. Partytime is over.


http://imdb.com/name/nm0001311/

How can you not love this? Thanks Steve Jobs.

Did Eugene Levy Lose a Bet?

I couldn't help but notice Eugene Levy once again reprises his "Jim's Dad" character in the next installment of the direct-to-DVD American Pie series entitled: American Pie: Beta House. This make Levy the only actor to appear in every American Pie movie. One has to wonder, what in God's name keeps drawing him back to do these tired, rehashed movies? One word: money.

"Brave Nudity" Rule

It is only brave to do nudity in a film if you're old and sagging like Kathy Bates in About Schmidt or Diane Keaton in Somethings Gotta Give. However, if you're some unknown actress showing your boobies in the twelfth direct-to-DVD American Pie movie, that is not considered brave.

"That Guy" Hall of Fame Presents: Xander Berkeley

Hey, isn't that Eddie Furlong's adoptive father from T2? Or, hey, isn't that the doctor from Gattaca? Or, hey isn't that other bad guy from Air Force One? Yes, yes it is. Xander Berkeley is one of the great prick character actors of the last 20 years and with a list of 146 roles (according to imdb.com) there is a reason why this guy keeps showing up in the places you least expect. His typical role is the insensitive bureaucrat or sniveling weasel type. Only rarely does he play an outright villain as in Air Force One. Usually poor Xander is stuck playing the loser, like in Heat when Al Pacino emasculates him upon discovering his wife's infidelities. He does manage to make his insensitive prick/bureaucratic type character elicit some sympathy like in season 2 of 24 as George Mason. George Mason, terminally stricken with radiation poisoning, heroically flies a terrorist armed nuclear bomb away from Los Angeles and also saves Jack Bauer in the process. His sad departure from CTU even earned him the poignant "silent clock" treatment. Xander Berkeley is married to Sarah Clarke, aka Nina Meyers to you 24 fans. Whenever you need a character who tirelessly follows the rules, always plays by the book, or just plain ol' gets in the hero's way, Xander Berkeley will be there.

http://imdb.com/name/nm0075359